The first of January 2011. For many this day will signify the end of a very short lived new resolution(s). The excitement for reaching new heights will quickly fade away, whether it is for a new health regime, a change in career, a new relationship, etc. Their momentum for fulfilling their resolution(s) will end due to the 'silent killers'. Why? Why is it that some new resolutions never work and who or what is the silent killer?
This blog is about the internal barriers that we give ourselves that prevent us from sticking to resolutions, regardless of whether we make them at the beginning of the year or mid July, for instance. The principles behind why we may not get the results we wish for remain the same. Below are 5 reasons (silent killers) why some new years resolutions never work and simple solutions to ensure your future success.
1. Social Acceptance
Firstly, why do people have new years resolutions? In a nutshell, because it's expected! It's why people will ask you 'What's your resolution?' and often you may feel that you must oblige by having one. So, not to be a bore and different, you may end up creating a resolution. And hey, let's be fair, when you think about the resolution, it actually makes you feel good, right? And you start to think about how good it would be to reach that goal.
Just because it feels good however, doesn't mean that it will continue to feel good. Be sure that your resolution is made not due to social pressure.
2. Intention
You probably haven't set a proper goal! This ties in with the above. It may make you feel good stating such an intention and that's great. However, that may be short-lived and you may find that by the 1st of January, you've lost interest and/ or momentum.
It would be more effective to run your intention/ goal through the neurological levels of alignment. That's a bit of a mouthful, so let me explain. The neurological levels of alignment ensure that you have the best foundation before you even begin to strive after your goal. It is a system used by many successful people and is easy to implement. I shan't go into detail today about each level of the alignment but below is a list of them. I will write another blog or report explaining how to progress through each of the levels, so look out for that.
- Environment
- Behaviour
- Capabilities
- Beliefs & Values (very important!)
- Identity
- Purpose
2. Negative Emotional Experience
That you may make the resolution in a light-hearted manner, will have a direct impact on your emotional experience. You will not have laid down any regulatory decisions 'red flags' to help you through the difficult times ahead, e.g. the early morning running schedule, fighting the urge to smoke or getting over your poor eating habits on a daily basis.
Without future pacing your goal(s) and actions, i.e. what I will say to myself when I just don't feel like doing it any more, you may run out of commitment and not be able to regulate your emotional experience quite early on (even as early as January 1st!). Just by giving yourself 'red flags' that pop up in your mind at the appropriate times, will ease the pressure.
4. Don't Pay Now...Don't Even Pay Later Syndrome
Procrastination is a killer of time and emotions! Because you've not laid down any certain plans, like how you are going to reach your goal(s), the various steps, etc, you will not feel a great need to work for your goal. You'll have the "I'll start tomorrow" type thought, which will not get you to where you want and need to be.
5. Poor Scheduling
We all have busy lives. It would be incredible naive to think that you can just slot another item into your busy diary, without proper forethought. Take time out, sit down and work out just how and where you will schedule-in your new resolution.
I truly hope that you regardless of where you are in the year, you will reach all your goals/ resolutions. Avoid the above pitfalls and I'm confident that you'll be well on your way to success, time and again.
I help many individuals with their goal-setting and it gives me great pleasure to see them achieve their desires. If you have a goal that you feel you need help in reaching please feel free to contact me today.
This is so true. Sometimes we do make off the cuff resolutions in jest more than all seriousness. I'm going to take more time to think about mine this time!!
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